Stepping Stones

 

Not sure how I woke up and immediately thought ‘How is 2025 almost over?”, “How is Christmas in 2 weeks?”. How did we get here so fast? 

What are we waitig for? I read a beautiful Substack article this morning. It was poetic and deep and meaningful. It was written they way that I like to read things and how I like to write. I remember an English teacher told me once that I use too many adjectives when I write. That is always great for a teenager’s ego and confidence to be a writer. NOT! 

I scrolled to the bottom of this article to read about the author… a wife and mother living in South Hampton…she mentioned her children’s ages and her husband’s name…I immediately thought ‘Sure she HAS the time to write’. I imagined her in a cozy chair curled up as she writes. I immediately think that I would love the leaisure time to just sit and write. 

I read one of her articles and she talks about doing things that you love to do before it is too late; before you are looking back on your life and thinking about the things you would do differenly. 

Heading into a new year usually makes everyone start creating their resolution lists. These lists are usually full of things we will do differently. They always have the ‘usual’ items like 

1. Make more money.
2. Spend time with family
3. Call Mom more often

Some of these are just ‘wishful thinking’…words that make us feel better about our current state of affairs. It is as if putting it on paper relieves us of some sort of guilt. 

I have become extrememly purposeful and intent driven when I make my resolution lists. I heard someone say, “Are you making a To Do List or a Wish List?”. Hmmm some of my items NEED to get completed. Some are mandatory for my business and success. Others are, well, a wish list! Things I would LIKE to have happen but, let’s face it, they probably won’t. Time and life often get in the way. 

Last year my resolution list was very business detailed. I am happy to say that I nailed it this year with my resolutions. Yes, I still have the list and YES I check it often. It is complete this year. I did it all. Now what? Just when you get done with your resolutions it is time to make new ones for the new year. 

This year will be different. The random author that I came across made me think… Why does the married author living in South Hampton, who writes every day, get to live her dreams of daily writing? Why did it hit a pang of jealousy with me? Why am I still thinking about her daily life? Why does she get to have all the fun? Why does my life look NOTHING like hers? Why me? Why me?

Why not me? Let me say it again and LOUDER for the people in the back. Why NOT me?

These days, I’m finding I just don’t have the bandwidth to worry about what anyone thinks of me. Maybe it’s the wisdom of a few more birthdays, maybe it’s feeling steady in my work, maybe it’s just the sweet comfort of knowing I’m doing just fine out here. Whatever it is, I’m deep into my “you know what? screw it—here’s the truth” chapter.

…and that is it! That’s the start of my Resolution List. I am channeling Nike and startting my list with Just Do It. Just effing DO IT! You want the things that a woman curled in a writing chair in the Hamptons…then do it. Create it! Do anything you have to do to get ‘er done. Work your ass off. Love with your whole heart. Appreciate where you came from and where you are…and where you are going. You want to write, then sit your butt down and start. Just start. You want a better life or a better body or a better outlook…just start. 

You see, a better life isn’t just bestowed to a select few. It isn’t just for those that you read about or those that worked hard when they were younger or those that had a better vision many years ago. It is those who WENT FOR IT. They got off their butts and made small changes that became habits that got them moving forward. 

I just read about the Dells. I often read about people and then become obsessed with them. My friends can tell you that about me. I hyper focus on someone. I focus so much on them that I almost stalk them (virtually). I find out as much about them as I possibly can to try to ‘figure them out’. I always need to find their WHY. So the Dells are not the Kardashians or the Besos. They live quietly and abundantly. Until last week when they donated $6.2 billion dollars to a cause they believe in. Click search the Dells. Click search the children. Click search the start up of the company. Click search the vision. Started in a garage with $1000. Started with a dream. Now, hello Dell computers. AHHHHH I love that crap! I loveeeee to hear and read and watch this. 

Why not me? I am not talking about creating a new infastructure. I am just sitting on my couch in an old robe, writing a crappy resolutions list. I am writing with a semi warm cup of coffee after having to throw out the last one since a tiny bug crawled in to it (win for the day was seeing it before the sip). 

What won’t be on my resolution list is family. My heart isn’t interested in padding a ‘to do’ list with things that should be automatic. My heart is reserved for the stuff that truly matters; the people who matter. My family doesn’t need a line item or a yearly reminder; they sit at the summit of my life, unshakable and untouchable. They’re the reason behind every choice, every late night, every early morning. They fill in all the cracks life leaves behind and light up every corner I walk into. They’re not a task to complete; they’re the whole point.

I can happily say that each year I get ‘better’. I am always a better version of the one I leave behing in the year prior. Some of my growth looks like giant movements and some are itsy bitsy tiny steps up a carefully placed (and often wobbly) ladder. But, hey, it’s still growth. Sometimes if all you can do is inch your way through life, then inch your way through life. If one carefully placed step is all you can do some days, then place that foot down and move. It doesn’t have to look grandious. It doesn’t have to be earth shattering. It doesn’t have to be noticed by anyone but yourself sometimes. 

Writing is a hobby of mine. I am adding it to my resolution list. I am going to write every Monday (and more if time allows)…what I am writing will gently unfold itself. What are your goals in 2026? Are they big or simply tiny steps to a better life?